This is probably one of the shortest blogs I am writing – but I hope it is a very enjoyable one. Regular readers will know my frustration with that great comedy show called The Apprentice. I love it – but as a comedy.
Well I saw this video on You Tube and I simply loved it. It is very, very funny. I love the way the humour builds up slowly. Please do watch the whole thing.
I am amazed both at the time people have and the creativity they have. It shows that this was painstakingly put together. I would love to have this team work with me on viral marketing campaigns!
One of my favourite comedy shows is back on TV. The Apprentice sees the return of 12 very brave contestants who have no fear about committing career suicide on TV. Mind you, with such grand titles as Global Strategist and Estate Agent, you feel that the economy will manage to somehow soldier on without their talents.
I have always had a problem with the way The Apprentice portrays business and what it takes to be successful. I do not claim to be an expert in business, but in my many years of being involved in business, I have yet to have the pleasure of working with these two-dimensional character types.
We had the one guy with the braces (don’t wear them until you are 35+ and by the way there is never a right age to wear elasticated trousers) who told us that for him “making money was better than sex”. The mind boggles with what kind of life he has led to make that comment, and I feel sorry for his entire ex’s. We had the guy who thought it was funny to say that in house, the women did all the cleaning. Wouldn’t half of the population just love to work for him?
But what really worries me is that these talentless self-obsessed bunch think they understand business. Business is about teamwork, collaboration, motivation, enthusiasm, being sharp and most importantly about being ethical. Other than wasted intelligence, can anyone see a difference between this group and the people who were running our banks?
Here are my top learning points from this weeks episode of The Apprentice;
Don’t spend too long on naming exercises; Calling yourself Team A or Team B will suffice
When meeting someone for the first time, don’t ask them if they have started anything (if you are both going for a job interview as an apprentice it is safe to assume that even if they did start something, it was not a huge roaring success)
Don’t call potential customers liars. (You may feel that my running a sales consultancy gives me an unfair advantage – but please trust me, it is something that I never got taught)
When negotiating – don’t talk over each other. Best still remember the golden rule of negotiating – silence is key!
When talking to men – don’t accuse all men of being stinky
I trust these pearls of wisdom are helpful. It is a shame I was not able to brief the candidates before the episode!
My name is Permjot and I am an early stage investor. Through this blog I hope to pass on my experiences in the world of early stage finance. Hopefully you will find it useful and maybe I'll even gain an investment or two.
Enjoy oh and and please get in touch if you have any specific questions.
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